Life Study

The Power of a Praying Husband/Wife

Pg. 203

In this chapter, Stormie tells about her golf experience. Her Husband bought her some golf clubs for Christmas. She had spent some time practicing and became frustrated attempting to hit the tiny little ball. But one day, while she was on the fairway, it all came together and her swing was on target and she felt what it was like to hit the ball correctly as it sailed down the fairway 170 yards. She says, “In that instant I understood why men spend so much time on the golf course. They want to hear that sound. They want to experience how it feels to do it right.”

“Thats the same way it is with obedience. You get the most wonderful feeling when you know that you have just obeyed God and it pleases Him. It’s seeing that, when you do things God’s way, the right way, life works. That feeling keeps you coming back and trying harder, because you want to do whatever it takes to experience it.” (Stormie)

I dare say, in this life we are all looking for satisfaction. To be content. One of the first forms of satisfaction which I learned as a young Christian was from obedience. Why would it be different now that I have a family and a little more knowledge? Its not, it is still the same. We “need” to be obedient to the creator of the universe to experience satisfaction.

There are many opportunities to experience satisfaction through obedience. When you teach your children right from wrong you are responding directly to what the scripture teaches. When you force yourself to be patient with your spouse through a difficult situation, you display obedience.

The path of the just is like the shining sun, that shines ever brighter unto the perfect day. Proverbs 4:19

As a side note to our study, I came across a great resource the other day. You know how it goes your surfing the web and one link leads to another. Take a look at this article. I thought it was very insightful. The author Dr. Richard D. Dobins, asks a very important question to any marriage:

Married people should ask themselves, “Am I depending upon my spouse to do for me what only God can do? Am I depending upon my spouse to make me a happy person, or am I bringing to my spouse a person who has already found happiness?” Dr. Richard D. Dobins

In today’s world, if you want your marriage to last a lifetime, you’ve got to do battle for it. Dr. Richard D. Dobins

Go ahead check it out, I realize the link is tiny but I had to fit it on the page…

Winning The Battle For Your Marriage

Here is my quick summary of this article:

1. Spouses can have the wrong expectations in marriage, erroneously believing that marriage can do something it was never intended to do.

2. Like a mirror that adds questionable weight to your profile, a marriage will magnify your behavior. If you have issues, marriage will not make it go away, it can enlarge those very problems.

3. At one point or another in our marriage, we will see the influence of our parents marriage relationship as its related to ours, whether good or bad. But the good news is, it can be reconciled.

4. The marriage example you are demonstrating to your children will be the model they take into their marriage.

The Power of a Praying Husband/Wife

Pg. 191

Picture yourself out sailing on a beautiful, clear, sunny day. A gentle wind is blowing in your face and rustling the sails. The water is calm as you glide along peacefully. You sense the open sea giving you life. You can feel it seeping through your pores and into your innermost being. You have a renewed sense that life is good. You can relax and enjoy the moment as you sail to your destination. (Stormie)

Carefree sailing like that only happens when it’s done right. The sails have to be positioned perfectly to catch the wind so the boat can move forward. If they don’t catch the wind properly, the boat can be tossed unpredictably. You can end up going in circles revisiting the same old territory, and never actually getting anywhere. Or worse yet, you can lose control and capsize. (Stormie)

It reminds me of my one and only sailing experience. When I was around 18 (at a company picnic back in Texas). The party took place on a very nice lake with all kinds of food and games, speed boats, sailing, etc. A co-worker convinced me to go on a small sailboat, after I had quizzed him on his experience with one. Once we were out on the lake, I realized he knew nothing of sailing, other than what he may have seen on t.v. The wind was blowing and we turned the boat over no less than 10 times (I counted it became so ridiculous). By the time they came with a speed boat to tow us in I was literally exhausted. We had to have assistance to get back to shore. The best part was being towed in to dock where 50 or so co-workers were waiting and watching. That was fun, I tried to explain to them we had been hired to test the turn-over ratio of a boat that size in 30 mph winds. I don’t think they bought it.

We can “assist” our spouse with serious prayer, we may not have all of the answers but our prayers and support will help them through any process they are going through (no matter how many times they flip the boat).

Do not remember the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I will do a new thing, now it shall spring forth; shall you not know it? I will even make a road in the wilderness and rivers in the desert Is. 43:18,19

The Power of a Praying Husband/Wife

pg. 185

“The perfect woman according to the Bible, is a hard worker. This woman creates, manages, and provides. She buys and sells property (a real estate agent?). She plants a vineyard (a gardener?). She makes clothing (a seamstress?). And she sells it (a retailer?). She is a woman of strength, energy, and vision. who works into the night and knows that what she has to offer is good. In the midst of it all, she takes care of her family, gives to the poor, and makes her husband proud. He is blessed by the excellence of all she does (Proverbs 31). If this is what your wife aspires to, she needs your help. Frankly, I’m exhausted just reading about it.” (Stormie)

Pg. 186
“No matter what the particulars of your wife’s work, it gives her fulfillment and the satisfaction of accomplishment if it makes life better for her, her family, or someone else. But she needs your prayers and support.” (Stormie)

Don’t be hesitant to encourage your wife to be all she can be in her work. It won’t mean that she will no longer need you when she is successful. In fact, quite the opposite. It will cause her to need you even more. If you support your woman in prayer, she will not get arrogant and cocky when the blessings roll in.” (Stormie)

“Your prayers will mean so much to her…” (Stormie)

He who has a slack hand becomes poor, but the hand of the diligent makes rich. Proverbs 10:4

The Power of a Praying Husband/Wife

Pg. 179
“Its amazing how we can live in the same house with a person for years and never know the deepest desire of his or her heart. And all because we don’t ask. Often our dreams and desires are so deep that we don’t even verbalize them. Or we believe that the possibility of them ever happening is so remote that we lose hope.” (Stormie)

Do you know any good listeners? In the grand scheme of things I wonder how much a good listener is worth. Reading this chapter it seems she is stressing the importance of “caring” about your spouse’s desires. In some cases, this means we need to put off our focus, our desires, our plans and concentrate on our spouse’s aspirations.

Delight yourself in the Lord and He shall give you the desires of your heart. Ps. 37:4

The Power of a Praying Husband/Wife

“In football, the perfect offense protects the quarterback from attack and frees him to do what he needs to do. He can either pass the ball to a receiver, hand off the ball to the running back, or run the ball to the goal line himself. This is exactly how your prayers of protection work for your wife. They create a strong wall around her so that no attack of the enemy can break through the lines to harm her. This allows her to do what she needs to do confidently and in safety” (Stormie)

Well, she used the football analogy so I felt compelled to put up an image of the greatest football franchise 🙂

Do you ever think about the time when you were young and did not have a care in the world? In other words you were unaware of the dangers that can happen, problems that could arise. I wonder if this is what heaven will be like.

And maybe it was only a small slice of time for you, living unaware, as a child. I know for me my world seemed to dramatically change before I was 12, when my parents divorced. It was as if I was awoken to the harsh realities of life. But God was always there. If your childhood was not abnormal you probably instinctively put your trust in your parents and lived life without a care, at least for awhile.

But now we (purposely) call upon the Lord for times of rest and protection. Yes, I think we have to work at it. And husbands can help by praying with discipline for their wives.

The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer; my God, my strength, in whom I will trust; my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. I will call upon the Lord, who is worthy to be praised; so shall I be saved from my enemies Psalm 18:2,3

The Power of a Praying Husband/Wife

“Much of the arguing and strife that goes on between marriage partners has to do with a lack of trust on the part of one or the other. The goal is to get to the point where both of you are so committed to the Lord that you can trust Him as He works in your mate”. (Stormie)

I think this last statement is insightful (maybe obvious to some), but I don’t usually think about a disagreement as it relates to trust. As I think back on my own experiences, I can see some differences which may have been avoided, had trust been at the forefront.

“Pray as well that God will give you the wisdom to lead your family and make right decisions. Often your wife’s hesitancy about following you is not because she doesn’t trust you, but rather because she trusts God more. She believes that only He knows certain things, and she wants to know that you have sought Him for decisions and will make decisions based on His will. She needs to be certain that you have your future together as a family firmly in mind when you make all decisions. Pray that your trust in God will be so evident that your wife can in turn trust God to have her best interests at heart as He works through you.”

Praying that your trust in God will be evident, is imperative. It can work wonders for a marriage. Of course we must work at it. You can’t just wave your magic wand and repeat 3 times, “I will trust, I will trust, I will trust”. It is a work in progress. Thats why its important to ask the Lord to help you trust Him more and then reveal your trust to your mate.

As for God, His way is perfect; The word of the lord is proven; He is a shield to all who trust in Him. 2 Sam. 22:31

The Power of a Praying Husband/Wife

“Lets face it. None of us can be who we need to be without the power of God transforming us and enabling us to change. Marriage certainly won’t transform any of us into a new person. However, wonderful changes can occur in us after we are married because now we are one with out mate an our prayers for one another have amazing new power. Miraculous things can happen. But often they don’t because we try to make things happen in our mates instead of asking God to do it.” (Stormie)

Life is a process. I once had the idea when I was young, that someday you arrive, some day over the hill everything will fall into place, but no longer. Its really all about the journey and how you respond.

One purpose which comes to mind is about the soil… “Others fell on the rocky places, where they did not have much soil; and immediately they sprang up, because they had no depth of soil. Matt. 13:5

We have responsibility for the soil. It has to be worked, watered, monitored and new seed planted.

“We can’t force someone to be a certain way. That’s why it’s usually futile to demand that someone be different than he or she is. In fact, that kind of pressure can eventually ruin a relationship. Putting the process of change entirely in the Lord’s hands means you can trust that His timing and methods are perfect–and then you become free to enjoy the process.” (Stormie)

Change, change, change, I don’t like it. Well, at first I usually don’t. Isn’t that true for most? Stop biting your finger nails, lose weight, stop saying dumb things, try to learn something, be more spiritual, be more serious, be more relaxed, say less, communicate better, work harder, don’t be a work a-holic, change your attitude, change your clothes, change your tooth paste, change the channel. So yes I am really glad God has His purpose for our lives.

…Who has saved us and called us with a Holy calling, not according to our works, but according to his own purpose and grace which was given to us in Christ Jesus before time began. 2 Tim. 1:9

“My one purpose in life is to help people find a personal relationship with God, which I believe, comes through knowing Jesus Christ”. (Billy Graham)